My Inner Man: Part 1

I’ve had a secret, or maybe not so secret fascination with transsexuals, or more specifically the fluidity of which some people can go from one gender to another, with or without surgery. I’m fascinated with living like the other and have been wanting to try my hand in passing as a man. As a teenager I dressed “hip hop”, with the baggy clothes and baseball caps. It was the style in the 90’s and my friends and I loved it. Being a former tomboy, I wallowed in the men’s section and wouldn’t be caught dead in the women’s section. I didn’t really learn what my size was in women’s clothes until I got to college and felt more at ease flaunting my sexuality. Later on in my early twenties I cut off all my hair and wore a short natural, again the current style for all hip sistas attending college. Because of my short hair and slim physique, when I put on a hat and a hoodie, I had quite a few older folks mistake me for a boy. Back then this enraged me, after all I was trying to be sexy! However now-a-days, age, weight, and a second puberty has caught up to me, leaving me with curves and a DD rack. This makes it damn near impossible for me to pass as anything but what I truly am.
When Oprah did her show about the pregnant man, a number of good books about transsexuals started to get some buzz. One of these books is called “Self-Made Man” a women’s year dressed and living as a man by Norah Vincent (that’s not exactly how the title goes). I’m still reading the book and am so enthralled. Her experiences as a man are so far hilarious and enlightening. However some of her reactions and transitional issues are some that I’m finding I wouldn’t have a problem with. The more I read the book, the more I think I could pass as a guy. Specifically communication style and mannerisms. My pops must’ve rubbed off on me in more ways than I thought. Something is to be said about little girls that 1) have a natural inclination to be a tomboy and 2) are raised by their fathers who perpetuate the tomboy because they don’t want to see their little girls in dresses.
So as I’m reading the book, I’m leaning more and more towards donning some homeboy gear and getting my swagger back. Stay tuned!